As told to her son Jonathan.
I think the most important thing I learned from my mother was to never give up. Giving up was a no-no, it was not a choice. She didn’t teach me with words – but with action. She would say, “You’re right” and that was enough, because praise was not in our family. We didn’t positively acknowledge each other.
This lesson helped me tremendously in the camp. It’s interesting that in the camp, my mother was the weak one and I became the strong one. I don’t know if psychologically it makes sense but perhaps I needed my strong mother to be weak in order that I could be strong. I could not give up because I didn’t want to lose her. It had consequences.
I remember marching in the snow, I organized it so there were five in a row. We put the one who couldn’t walk in the middle and carried them so they would not fall. If you fell, it was the end, they would shoot you.
To fall was not a choice. In ordinary life we always have choices and that was something I had to learn as an adult. We have choices, and we give choices to others. That was a difficult lesson to learn.
Erika Jacoby, 93, is a social worker, educator, author and mother and child.
