Elul 24: Extending a Hand by Nathanial Helfgot

Fifteen years ago I experienced a serious bout of depression that was devastating and painful. The mental anguish and the hopelessness that entered my world at the moment when I was at a wonderful place in my career were overwhelming. It was as William Styron has termed it, a period of “Darkness Visible” with a suffocating closure of life and joy.

Through getting the right help, therapy, and medication, and through the support of good and devoted friends, I was able to survive and emerge from that challenge. The aftermath of that experience and subsequent battles with depression have left me with the appreciation for the fragility of life and the importance of friends and community who extend a hand of outreach and compassion in difficult circumstances. Elul, the tradition teaches, is a time when God is more present, ready to listen and care for the human being. The Hebrew letters of the month, we are told, are an acronym for the phrase, “Ani ledodi vedodi li.” I am (devoted) to my beloved (God) and my beloved (God) is (devoted) to me.

One of the foundational elements of Jewish ethics is the concept of imitatio dei, of following in the footsteps of the Divine in our own behavior. We are challenged, states the Talmud, to clothe the naked, bury the dead, and visit the sick as God is described as having done in the Bible. Maimonides extends this to all ethical behavior and demands of us to be God-like in all our behavior. Elul is a month to take on the challenge of being a real friend to another, to imitate the very essence of the Elul call. It is the time to be fully present and extend the hand of love and support for those who are most vulnerable and hurting, not just those hurting on the outside, but those hurting on the inside in mental anguish and turmoil.


Rabbi Nathaniel Helfgot is the Chair of the Bible and Jewish Thought Departments at Yeshivat Chovevei Torah Rabbinical School in New York City. www.yctorah.org