As a child at Jewish summer camp, I liked playing drama games. One of my favorites was “mirroring.” Facing my partner, we tried to mimic each other’s movements so closely that a bystander couldn’t guess who was leading and who was following. Fast-forward about twenty years, I became a volunteer Mikveh Guide, showing and teaching visitors, many of them first-time users of any mikveh, through a new and potentially frightening ritual. And yet, I discovered that I wasn’t ever the leader.
As a Mikveh Guide I would mirror the energy of the person who came to immerse in the ritual bath. The woman who arrived bubbly, telling me the details of her daughter’s upcoming wedding? I’d chat right back. The one who was withdrawn and sad, healing from a miscarriage and simply looking to start over? I’d speak softly and quietly show her to her preparation suite. Mikveh Guides ask themselves, “What can I do to make this experience as meaningful as possible?” “How can I say ‘yes’?” “Do I need to be present or do I need to get out of the way?” The answer is different for each situation.
Our tradition teaches, “There are seventy faces to the Torah.” (Bamidbar Rabbah 13:15-16) These faces are a metaphor for the multiple interpretations of any verse and multiple identities represented within the text itself. And each one is valid. At Mayyim Hayyim, there are 144 faces to the mikveh. 144 Mikveh Guides who are not gatekeepers, but door openers. They are female, male, and transgender. They are people of color, Jews-by-choice, and Jews in interfaith marriages. They represent the full denominational spectrum. Their diversity mirrors the Jewish people.
144 ways of welcoming, 144 identities represented. 144 facets of the community on one side of the mirror, on the other, many more. All of them welcome.
